Apologies again for the title…it was either that or “Show me the Monet!” To cover our drive through Rouen, Giverny and, finally, Versailles.  I don’t actually have anything to say for what was a day trip, just really liked the 2 potential titles, but, as it turns out, the one chosen is quite apt.  The town of Rouen, famous for burning Jean d’Arc (so not an overly great reason to be famous in French history), had an amazing Cathedral (quelle surprise), but was otherwise a little underwheling.  And Versailles, looks as if it was built by someone who thought of himself as the Sun King.

After Rouen, we headed to Giverny with high hopes, low expectations and one of us had an overwhelming desire to never drive again.  However, Monet’s former home and gardens were more than worth the visit…if such a phrase even has any meaning in English.  I guess in French, you would say it’s “impossible”.  As in you cannot give 110%, that is 10% more than you can give, any more is impossible and not even worth trying, and please go away thank you,  it’s siesta time from 12 to 16 heures…but please use exact change before you go.

Ok…where was I? Francesomewhere… .Rouen, Givnerny, got it.  After ten days of driving, James finally dropped that car off in Versailles without a scratch! And at the same time, dropped Lea’s phone without a scratch completely smashing it to a billion pieces.  No matter………I don’t mind doing something stupid…haha…everything’s fine! 🙂 Will totally grow my nails back in the last 4 days.

We checked into  an incredible hotel near the Trianon, where we were kindly offered to upgrade our room to one with a view of the gardens for the very low price of purchasing an extra room, seeing as the hotel was almost empty.  Upon saying, “sorry, no, that would eat into our immense wine budget”, we bonded with the lady at reception, who shared the same birthday as Lea and had been to Perth, so we were very excited as she handed us the keys saying, “here are the keys……to the worst room in the hotel…if you can call it the hotel, you need to walk across the gardens to the shack on the otherside”.   If they upgraded us it would have contradicted their rule to only upgrade those who are old enough that they could never possibly return, and are unlikley to have any friends left to recommend them……

If it wasn’t then we realised we were in a…let’s say H**** owned hotel or if that’s too obvious let’s just call it a Paris Hotel (seeing as we’re in France), it certainly sank in when in our room (that for extra impact had somehow been dug in below the dirt line to ensure the only view was of their ant farm) we noticed the usual sign of “if your fingerprints are found on the mini-bar, we assume you’ve licked everything and you must pay. Enjoy your stay with the … group of awful hotels”.  We thought of dropping in Conrad’s name, having watched every episode of Madmen we felt he would have been reasonable, but, instead, went and drank along side the Grand Canal looking towards the Chateau.  And jokes on them, we were able to climb out our window and turn the dirt into a balcony.

Anyway…the awful commercialisation of the … chain aside, Versailles is ridiculous.  The buildings, the canal and the gardens, which almost made Lea laugh as James suggested they would be arborous work to maintain (NB: of course she didn’t laugh, as won’t you, the readers).  I think all the readers agrees that democracy simply doesn’t work, and Versailles is proof.  We had an amazing time, accidentally ate at a newly crowned Michelin starred restaurant, where our Franglish helped make it one of the best meals we’ve ever had, and most importanly…dropped off the car….which had 201km’s on it when we picked it up and now had over 2000km’s…however, we failed to mention that the clutch may be due it’s 100km service.

PS- If anyone’s wondering, James’ shaver broke…which explains the face.  The extra chins are for a very different reason.